the JOYS of nursing

So in the last week and a 1/2 I worked 6 night shifts. I hate night shift...my body was definetely not made to stay up in the wee hours of the night. But despite having to work the dreaded night shifts, I also had to work during the night when everyone else got to turn back the clocks and sleep an extra hour. You see, I have never experienced this before, because indiana used to opt out of saving daylight so I was greatly excited to enjoy an hour of sleep without losing any time. BUt of course I had to work....which means my 12 1/2 hour night shift just jumped to 13 1/2. So I got the pleasure of changing all of the clocks at 1 a.m. back to 12 a.m. At 12:30 the second time I was feeling major deja-vu. Reliving that hour was pure torture. I also had the pleasure of caring for a lady who must be sitting straight up to breath. So I got her settled in bed with the head of the bed straight up and more pillows to push her even higher up, then I brought her her pills. Of course she yells at me that she can't take pills laying down (so after arguing with her for five minutes that she wasn't laying down but sitting completely straight up in the bed I finally moved her to the edge of the bed).... sounds like no big deal...but in order to get her back in bed I have to get help...lay her flat...and scoot her back up in the bed because she can't scoot herself....the whole time she protest that she cannot lay down and resisting us... it gets worse....she has pills every hour for 4 hours....that's four times of this process. Plus once we get her into position she insist she is not sitting up enough plus she had to poop twice and wanted to sit in the chair for awhile...needless to say it took every muscle in my body to resist the urge to smack her or sedate her. On my 6th night shift I was fortunate enough to get the patient that needed to be in a 1:1 but the hospital was so short staffed they did not have anyone to come sit in his room....so they cut me down to 2 pts. Now my guy who needs the 1:1 is extremely confused and very grouchy. When I brought him his pills he says "you take them", called me a liar, and told me to go to hell. I told him I would continue to annoy him until he took them...so 10 minutes later he took them. Then I had to give him a powder medicine dissolved in juice (he of course must take this medicine 3 times four hours apart.... this was dose one) Of course this also took major convincing to drink. About a 1/2 hour after drinking the medication he vomited blood.... he was convinced the drink made him vomit and would never drink anything from me again (GREAT) I then decided to turn out the lights to see if he could sleep (bad idea) The dark only made him more confused. Suddenly he was trying to get out of bed. Of course he can't because he has one-sided weakness. I am freaking out because I know he will fall and he weighs a good 25o. So I peek in the hallway...no one around. I run back to him and he is now hanging off the bed... he isn't even able to pull himself to sitting and is trying to slide out of bed. I flip the call light on and hope someone comes. I am grabbing his IV and catheter lines so they don't get ripped out and trying to convince him he is in the hospital. He of course thinks I am lying and he is at home and now he is going to the grocery. He becomes so angry he tries to hit me. Finally help came and we got him in bed. I decide to leave the lights on to help with the confusion. The rest of the night he continued to argue, throw things on the floor, and try to escape. When it was time to drink that medication again, I could not put it in juice because his blood sugar was too high so I mixed it in water and gave it to him...of course not telling him that it's in there. He became extremely angry at me for tricking him and throws it on the floor. ugh! At 7:00 I find him tugging on his catheter really hard! I try to get him to stop but he thinks it's his fishing line and he caught a fish. I then called the cath team to come look at it. Unfortunately he had pulled it to the point the balloon is in his penis and the tube is kinked so there is no way to get the balloon to deflate. The cath guy has to call a surgeon to come look at it. Meanwhile why he is calling I have the pleasure of trying to keep mr. grumpy pants in the bed and holding still...yeah right! While we waited for the surgeon the cath guy continues to squeeze and wiggle the catheter and he accidently pulls it out with the balloon inflated. ouch!! tons of blood begins rushing out and he tells me to pinch the penis and hold it up so he can get supplies. So here I am pinching this man's penis that is bleeding profusely and and he is swearing at me and trying to go to the grocery. ... 10 minutes later the cath guy is back and we get the situation under control... I have now stayed a 1/2 hour after my shift... bummer. I finally catch the shuttle and begin my walk home. It has dropped 30 degrees since i went to work and I have no coat. I have to walk from the shuttle lot home (1/2 mile) with no coat and into the wind. Finally I collapse inside only to be greeted by the scent of brady poop...mark had been running late that morning and didn't take brady out. I cleaned up the poop and made it to my bed. Finally sweet sleep has arrived and no more night shift .... for now!