Lessons by Brady

So one day I was helping myself to a snack of cheddar cheese and crackers. If you know me you know I love cheese. Mark is also quite fond of it and it is a staple in our home. I often by a large brick of cheddar cheese to meet all of our cheddar needs.

So any way...I had my large brick of cheese on the counter and decided to leave it out in case I wanted a little more. I settle in beside Hayden on the floor to enjoy my scrumptious cheese and crackers....when suddenly I had that feeling that something was awry. That mother instinct was kicking in...the one when you know one of your children is up to something. (and yes this instinct kicks in when you get a dog) I quickly jump to my feet to find Brady. As soon as I stand I see my 100 lbs lab holding my 1lb brick of cheese in his mouth. I couldn't believe it...he very rarely steals from the counter (I can count the times on one hand) this was one area I was actually proud of him for mostly behaving....but here he stands guilty as can be. We make eye contact and I yell out "NOOOOOOOOOOO!!" knowing exactly what his next move is...get to the table.... once by the dining room table we play his favorite game of "round and around the table we go...you can't catch me" I wanted to kill him!!! My beautiful new brick of cheese was being destroyed....and I would not allow him the pleasure of eating his prize for fear of the vomiting on the carpet that would surely follow eating a pound of cheese. So after about 50 times around the table in various directions...one pulling of the tail...a couple of dives under the table I finally sat down to try a new tactic... I like to call it the "Wait and Pounce" approach. Slowly he started to venture away from the table to a new spot where he could enjoy his cheddar. I pretended not to notice....THEN I POUNCED.... and yes I literally flung my body with all my might at my 100lb dog... "GOT YOU!!!" I pried the cheese out of his mouth with full satisfaction at my football tackle skills.

You think the story ends there...you are mistaken....it only gets better!!

So I hated to toss my beautiful expensive brick of cheese...so I grabbed a knife and chopped it up into bite sizes, placing it in a bag to use as treats for Brady...when he actually was behaving.
When Mark came home I couldn't wait to tell him what HIS dog had done. I of course launched into a very dramatic storytelling complete with demonstrations. As many of you may know Mark isn't always the best listener and does not fully appreciate my attention to detail in storytelling.... At the end I told him how I had managed to not waste our money by creating dog treats. I even told him how I cut them, placed them in a bag, and what shelf they were on in the fridge.....

So........ a few days later I notice mark getting out a cracker to bribe Brady outside with. I quickly say "Don't waste our food on him, give him the cheese I cut up for him, you know the one he stole off the counter"

Mark's face slowly changes as he processes what I just said.

"You mean the cheese cut up all nice in the fridge is the cheese Brady had in his mouth"

"Yes Mark. I told you that. Why?"

"I ate some of that."

me laughing......"How much?"

"At least 15-20 pieces." his face twisting in disgust at the thought.

"You know he drinks out of the toilet."

"I KNOW... I DON'T WANT TO THINK ABOUT IT!"

"Weren't you listening when I told you all about the chasing, tackling, and saving money by making dog treats?"

"I remember you saying he took the cheese, and you got it, and then something about you cut some cheese up and it's in the fridge."

"Maybe you should listen a little closer next time." haha!

Lesson from Brady: Listen to your wife...not everything she says is meaningless!